it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
