his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So squirting runs in the family.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Still dying that you shit outside
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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