Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
