Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Don't tell me you're on acid again