Texts From Last Night

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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt

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  (989): I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt http://tfl.nu/o754
  Replies (7) Good night (2723) Bad night (1195)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list

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  (678): well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list http://tfl.nu/inae
  Replies (4) Good night (2736) Bad night (743)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.

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  (713): I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't. http://tfl.nu/hscn
  Replies (5) Good night (1677) Bad night (520)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt

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  (239): At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt http://tfl.nu/gv5c
  Replies (12) Good night (2397) Bad night (1001)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?

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  (917): i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far? http://tfl.nu/ph4e
  Replies (59) Good night (5939) Bad night (1232)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.

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  (479): I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head. http://tfl.nu/p8jq
  Replies (20) Good night (1348) Bad night (4311)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  The "puke-towel" started to grow something...

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  (309): The "puke-towel" started to grow something... http://tfl.nu/d1rv
  Replies (10) Good night (700) Bad night (4778)
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  (707): View more from California

  She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.

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  (707): She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her. http://tfl.nu/yn7x
  Replies (15) Good night (5003) Bad night (1719)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well

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  (401): do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well http://tfl.nu/8t7l
  Replies (7) Good night (1044) Bad night (3458)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat

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  (902): The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat http://tfl.nu/pk4p
  Replies (3) Good night (2727) Bad night (1257)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.

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  (407): If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life. http://tfl.nu/zp1p
  Replies (11) Good night (891) Bad night (2433)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.

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  (903): We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service. http://tfl.nu/lvor
  Replies (4) Good night (682) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today

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  (614): Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today http://tfl.nu/chyo
  Replies (5) Good night (957) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.

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  (914): Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody. http://tfl.nu/x371
  Replies (1) Good night (676) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude

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  (914): If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude http://tfl.nu/4fbw
  Replies (2) Good night (721) Bad night (184)

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