He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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