the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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