O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
