what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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