Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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