It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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