Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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