we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
