He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
