We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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