I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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