i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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