there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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