It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
