hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
