it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
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