I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize