My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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