she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
soo... how was my night?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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