it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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