C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
