There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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