I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
