Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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