can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I'm passing your future prison.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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