okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
