K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
