I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
How's work?
Spinning.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
