Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
