This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
