carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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