god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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