I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
