worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
