I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
