buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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