i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Randomize
