Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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