Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
