He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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