Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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