i permit you to call me
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
