You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
you win again, gameday.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
