It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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