Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
